Losing a small pet still SUCKS
If you follow me on Twitter/Instagram, then you might have seen me talking about this last week, but my lil Russian dwarf hamster Jeff passed away on Thursday. He'd not been very well, so it wasn't the biggest shock in the world but I was still pretty distraught. I thought I'd get over it quite quickly, and we've got some new little fluffy hammies now, which I thought would make the pain of losing Jeff go away. But it hasn't, obviously. I'm not sure why I thought it ever would.
Even as I sit down to write this, I feel a bit silly: are you really going to write a whole post on grieving for a hamster Steph?! Well yes, yes I am. I don't want anyone else to feel the way that I've felt over the past few days: invalidated. I've had people laugh and had more than a few 'it's only a hamster' comments, but pets are a part of your family. If you had a cat or dog that passed away at two would you grieve? Of course. It's the same for me and my little hammies.
Grief is a thing, it happens. And it's happened far differently than I thought it would this week. I thought I was okay with Jeff passing, especially as I have little Frank and Sid to look after now (their names are just too cute IMO). But, I looked over the fact that me and Jeff had a special bond, and I don't have that with the new babies. Working in my office feels weird without him wandering up to his door to be taken out for a cuddle. I even found myself full on ugly crying at 1am last night because I just missed him so much.
The thing is, Jeff wasn't just another pet to me. He was the first pet that me and my boyfriend bought together. We got him when I was really struggling with my mental health. Getting out of bed in the morning and just being alive seemed a little too much. We got Jeff to help get me out of that rut. I had to be up every day to check on Jeff and his brother to make sure they had cuddles, food and water. Jeff gave me a purpose when I had lost my way a bit. Now that he's gone I'm just so grateful that I had such a loving creature who looked after me just as much as I looked after him.
All in all, I really just wanted to say that small pets can occupy a big place in your heart, and it's totally okay to grieve over losing them. Don't let anybody tell you how you should or shouldn't feel.
Have you lost a small pet before?
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Honestly I would never, ever say 'just' about any animal - and I totally understand your pain! They're one of the family and its so so hard when any animal passes. Im so sorry darling, but Im sure you made him feel so loved while he was here <3 xx
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't either - everyone's pets mean so much to them! He was such a happy litte hammy ^_^
DeleteSteph x
Oh my gosh - you've made me cry now!! I know how you're feeling - I've lost pets, big and small before. The first pet my fiance and I had together was a goldfish, and he died only a few weeks after we got him. I was devastated, and full on cried about it, but my family were mystified! There seems to be this idea, wrong idea I might add, that small pets (fish, hamsters etc) aren't to be grieved over the same as big pets (cats, dogs etc) which just isn't true. They all, big or small, become part of our families and it's totally natural to grieve them! Jeff was very lucky to have you looking after him, and I know you'll never forget him but in time it will get easier. Hugs xx www.aimeeraindropwrites.co.uk
ReplyDeletePets so are a part of your family! Thank you
DeleteSteph - www.nourishmeblog.co.uk
I am so sorry to hear this, pets are like family, honestly my pets are more important to me than people! I am sure Jeff had a wonderful happy life with you! take care xx
ReplyDeleteThank you! I so rate my pets over some people too haha!
DeleteSteph x
I totally understand the pain you're going through and I am sending you all of the hugs and love that I can muster! Don't be ashamed to grieve and give yourself time, lovely. Your feelings are totally valid!
ReplyDeleteI don't know if this will help but Keira Rose on Youtube did a video recently about grieving for pets as she's had some of her rats pass: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moFaazv5phA
Bethany | Curly and Wordy
Thank you sweet. Ooh I had no idea, thanks for the link!
DeleteSteph x
Ahhh little darling hamster - so sweet! I'm really sorry to hear about him passing away, and grieving for a little hammy is exactly the same as when a dog/cat dies - its not different! I felt the same when my little Squim passed away last year :(
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post.
Olivia @ Olivia Roses
It's so horrible when they pass, and you do need to take time out to grieve for sure
DeleteSteph x
I'm so so sad to hear this chicka - doesn't matter how small they are, they're still loved <3
ReplyDeleteThey sure are! Thank you
DeleteSteph x
Oh sweet 💔 I can totally relate to you grieving for your hamster - I was the same when my Theodore passed away a couple of years ago. It hurts so much and some people can be really small minded and think they don't matter but they really do. This was such a lovely post and a wonderful tribute to Jeff 🐹💙 Ellis x // www.elliswoolley.co.uk
ReplyDeleteTheodore is SUCH a lovely name for a hamster, I love it! It upsets me that people really don't think it matters
DeleteSteph x
Anyone who knows me personally, knows that I can become quite attached to animals, whether it be a hamster or a dog, it's just in me.
ReplyDeleteI had never had a pet before, so when we rescued a kitten over the Christmas holidays four years ago, I was instantly obsessed. She was the sweetest little thing, a bit jumpy but so cuddly. I called her Willow and had every intention of keeping her, in-fact I barely slept I was so excited to see her in the morning! - I was also 30 minutes late for school haha! But when I got home, she was gone. My brother had called a local shelter and had gotten rid of her whilst I was at school, I never forgave him for that and I cried a lot over it, but I eventually started to get over my shitty feelings, especially when I started volunteering at that particular shelter and was able to see her off to a new home. Apparently she runs the whole house now! x
www.sheintheknow.co.uk
Oh no, that's so awful! I would be heartbroken. I get attached to things so easily, and I knew I'd be distraught over losing little Jeff
DeleteSteph x